Friendship

“A friend is one who walks in when others walk out”
-Walter Winchell

“Don’t walk in front of me, I may not follow.
Don’t walk behind me, I may not lead.
Walk beside me and be my friend.”
– Albert Camus (also attributed to Maimonidies)

This is a year that I think i will make new friends or solidify old friendships.  I feel that too many people don’t truly understand me, and it has brought a sadness into my heart.  I’m too old and too tired to feel guilty for things I should not. I aslo can not play the passive aggressive game, that is not me.  I need to try harder to make the friendships I want last.   New friends are always welcome, yet I lack action. Things need to change, in my heart and in my life.  The only way they will change is if I decide to change them. It’s going to be a hard road,  but I don’t want to feel lonely and misunderstood.

I married the person who understands me most.  There must be others out there like that, but he often feels misunderstood as well.

Change has been going on for years, yet I feel sometimes people still see me as someone I was and not someone I am.   There will be more change to come. I will make it so. I will make myself happy. I can no longer feel this way, and I’m tired of being called crazy for expressing my feelings , no matter how silly.

Change is in the air and I am hopeful.


One thought on “Friendship

  1. I can relate to a lot of what you are saying here. It’s a melancholy feeling when you realize that people aren’t recognizing the change and the growth you’ve been through.

    It’s hard to let down the walls so others can peek in, when you’ve seen how much damage that kind of attention can cause.

    Real friends recognize each other’s development without trying to have a hand in changing it. That’s why they are able to pick up where-ever they left off. =)

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